Photo of the Week #1

Following Charlotte's impressive new initiative to provide some semblance of organization in this blog and follow a theme, I too would like to present my new theme. Yes, like the middle child striving to receive attention, I am going to wave about my accomplishments in the hope that you will acknowledge and perhaps even...love...me?

Seeing as that got weird (only two sentences in, doing well), let's move on. In deciding this theme I wanted to present something edgy, sexy, avant-garde, something that will make you re-think the words "hobby blog." Okay, I clearly haven't written a blog in a while because every time I start a sentence I end up taking it in the most ridiculous direction I can think of instead of actually building upon the content of this entry.

Let's try that again.

In deciding this theme, I wanted to echo the creative simplicity of Charlotte's clothing theme and pick something that is accessible to everyone but also has many different sides to it that can be explored. I also wanted to pick something I am more interested in as a hobby, rather than writing about something to do with animals (which I did all summer and could easily continue doing, but let's strive for some diversity here). So considering those criteria, I decided that I will try to keep my new photography hobby alive and do a Photo of the Week entry! (Click here to experience the proper level of celebration)

I only just acquired my very exciting new life partner, the Fujifilm X-A1 (shout-out to my homie Al for helping me find this bad boy!), two weeks ago, so I will preface my new initiative with the warning that you will not be impressed. I mean, you may be impressed with the ree-donk-ulous image quality that this dope little device creates, but beyond that the photographic prowess will be minimal, nay, absent. We can only hope that I will do this thing called "learning" along the way and actually improve, but since I can imagine that within a few weeks this Photo of the Week thing is going to end up with me going oh shit on Friday evening and taking a picture of my cat for you guys, let's not be too optimistic.

And with that rousing endorsement, let the fun begin! With the First. (BOOM) Photo. (POW) Of Theeeeeee Week! (applause, cheering, a charismatic host with perfectly coiffed hair enters, struts across the stage and leans casually on a podium; in case you want a visual, I am imagining Johnny Bravo's face with the red flared suit of Ron Burgundy)

Well Groomed Host: Welcome, welcome! Haha! Welcome to the very first edition of Photo (BOOM) Of (POW) The Week. I'm so glad you've joined me tonight - except you, guy in the front row (laughter) - haha but seriously. I'm so glad you've joined me tonight to experience this special moment in blogging history. Blogging history?

to stage left: I thought this was a reality TV show...uh huh...yeah...weird author...I see...yes...questionable mental state...hm...that makes sense...

Ohhh ho ho KAY folks! Sorry about that little aside, you know how it is in show biz, things happening on the fly! As I was saying our show tonight is going to include some of the most bombastic new photography on the market, courtesy of our resident photographer and easily distracted writer, Sarah Nason!

(applause, I enter via triple front handspring and land on top of the podium, then do that thing gymnasts do where they stick the landing and then hold their arms up like WHAT NOW)

WGH: What an entrance! You sure know how to grab a room's attention, Ms. Nason.

Me: Well thank you Mr. Host, I do what I can. (I casually descend from the podium and amicably put one arm around WGH's shoulders) Must have somehow learned a thing or two along the way, being an Olympic ranked gymnast for three seasons haha! (laughter)

WGH: So humble! Now, the producers tell me you have something special in store for us today. What's the scuttlebud?

Me: I'm so glad you asked exactly that question, Mr. Host. Mainly because I love the word scuttlebud. Indeed I have quite the treat for you all. All of you out in the audience, how are you FEELING tonight?!

(mild self-conscious cheers)

Me: I saaaaaaaaiiiiiid HOW. ARE. YOU. FEELING toniiiiiiiiight?!??!

(audience screams fervently because they do not want to be asked again)

Me: All RIGHTY then! I think we're ready to see something. 

WGH: Fantastic! What have you got for us tonight? (we each sit on a plush talk-show-y chair; he crosses his legs and leans in earnestly)

Me: Well. I hope you're all ready for something that's gonna blow your socks right off. My first piece that I would like to present to you is entitled "Obstructions II."

WGH: Interesting, starting with "II." What happened to one?

Me: In this series everything starts at two. Because the first time you try something, it's never going to be perfect. People who submit first versions of things are really just saying "hey, I'm lazy."

WGH: Deep, deep. Well, let's see this piece!

Me: Absolutely. Charlotte?

(Charlotte wheels a large, rectangular display currently concealed by a dramatic black curtain onstage and leaves the stage immediately, not even glancing at the audience; she appears to be in a rush to do something more important than indulging a fake talk show and checks her watch as she disappears offstage)

Me: Let's all give her a thank you! (audience applauds; holding a hand up to make it appear that I am whispering, yet still speaking at a significant volume:) She needed some work, poor thing. Keeping her chin up though.

WGH: (ignoring the clearly false comment) Would you like to do the honours Ms. Nason?

Me: You're too kind! (I walk confidently to the curtain and make a big to-do of gesturing at it in a model-presents-sports-car kind of fashion; after milking this beyond the point that it is at all funny, I whisk the curtain off the display to reveal...)

(the crowd applauds politely)

WGH: Is that...an awkwardly sumptuous photo of your cat?

Me: Correct.

WGH: ...cool.